It's just Me Abby

I love my two sons more than I can describe.  My younger son Charlie (5 months) is laying beside me sucking on a toy and my older son Max (22 months) just picked a boogie out of his nose the size of New Mexico.  I have great joy in staying home and caring for them.  It can be very overwhelming at times, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything.  Ironically, being Momma to my boys day in day out and the craziness that accompanies it doesn’t threaten my character as much as being a wife does.

Marriage.  Two broken and sinful people becoming one until death do you part.  It is remarkably wonderful and yet a most Herculean undertaking.  Committing to love for “better or worse” is no joke.  We usually associate tragedy to all things “worse” but let us also equate hot tempers and any other sin that casts an unattractive shadow upon our delinquent spouse.

One of the very first things I learned very quickly after getting married was that I was a lot worse of a person than I realized.  My meanness level went from low to high and the reality of not being as good as I thought was pretty devastating.

I hate the word unbecoming.  It has a sense of ugliness about it.  And it is the epitome of who I am when I quench the Spirit and lack love in the “worse” times of contentions with my husband.

I like to read and I crave insight on being a better wife through books, but I’m not too crazy about books on marriage that address the roles of husbands and wives.  Please don’t get me wrong, those books are excellent and very needed (especially if you read it together with your spouse), but rarely do I read those kind anymore.  If I do, I’m too busy thinking I wish my husband was reading this, then things would be easier to work through; not necessarily because I’m right and he’s wrong, but because the nuggets of wisdom  would be most beneficial to the both of us than just to me alone.   At this point, because of my own selfishness, I find it better for me to read a knowledgeable book written for women and wives than to be reading chapters on how my husband should be acting. But better still, let me go directly to the source of love itself, God and his Word.

My previous blog post was about my Top 10 bible verses as a Christian.  Well, my very close friend and I decided to create another: our Top 10 as a wife.  We know where our personal struggles and weakness lie in our role as wives so we individually created a quick list cheat sheet to run to since,

God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. 1 Corinthians 10:13

Pride, anger, fear, selfishness, etc. are only some of the many hangups we have in our marriages, and the best way to combat them are through the Spirit and the powerful word of God.  I challenge you to create a condensed list of verses and begin to commit them to memory so that when you are tempted to unleash the fire-breathing dragon within upon your spouse you’ll first recognize the escape before you.

Here are just a few suggestions you can add to your list:

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus.  Philippians 2:3-5

A continual dripping on a rainy day and a quarrelsome wife are alike.  Proverbs 27:15

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.  Ephesians 4:32

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.  My Top 10James 1:19